Happy Hour Show

This summer Happy Hour is taking you on a world tour of our favorite bars, shops, local bums to throw a penny to and best couches to crash on. (Don’t stop at Tori’s place). And of course we will start our warped tour with the enchanting Astoria - home of your very own Happy Hour wonder women.

Our guest in the studio is Rob, neighborhood guru, and he has an opinion on just about every drink and dessert in our beloved ‘hood. His reviews will make the saliva drip from your hot summer lips.

Here’s a complete list of all our top Astoria picks. We even bothered to list the websites for you:

Kaufman Astoria Studios
Socrates Sculpture Park
Vesta Trattoria & Wine Bar
The Bohemian Hall and Beer Garden
Ovelia Restaurant
Il Bambino Restaurant
Rapture Lounge
Crescent Lounge
Sac’s Place Pizza
Break Bar & Billiards

So, if your summer plans include the Big Apple, don’t be a stranger to Queens. Manhattanites hate tourists. Ride the yellow trains across the East River and enjoy the Greek, Brazilian, Mexican and plethora of flavor in one of the best boroughs in the world. 5 million people live here - we know what we’re drinking.

And of course if your a devoted HH listener, you must let us know you’re here and we’ll have you on the show. Lucky you.

Send us your random news, drink recipes, rants and praises! We love to hear from our fans and foes: cheers@HappyHourShow.com

In an effort to be a fair and balanced show for our listeners, we’d like to take the opportunity to exploit a different group of people on today’s show: the Jews.  Our latest victim in the studio will be Jess, a bona fide, but of course non-practicing, Jewess.

What does kosher really mean, do all Madoff victims live in Miami and what does a lady serve when she says she invites a man up for tea and scones?

Its all about the money and the matzo…and some very inappropriate dating stories from Jess - and they don’t involve boys with yarmulkes.

Today is all about being good and doing good for others. Yes - it is possible!

Our guest today is Tony B., returning for his third appearance on the Happy Hour show. We will chat about his new project aimed at helping people while helping himself. He is fit and fabulous and saving lives.

And believe it or not - Tori has something to contribute on today’s show. Leslie - maybe not…

Also - check out our online Poll on which will be next to legalize same-sex marriage. Tell us what you think and we’ll announce the results on the next week’s show!

Once again, Happy Hour is at the top of WTNR’s Hot Shows List! Thanks to all of our wonderful prison inmate pen pals for tuning in live each Tuesday to make Leslie and Tori #1.

This week we have DJ Lobotomy on the show to rehash some anal issues, dissect the wondrous Special Olympics and slam down some Malibu shots. She is one crazy DJ, and you should check out The Freakshow on www.wtnrradio.com every Friday from 6am to 2pm.

Once again, a little tipsy and a lot mouthy, Leslie and Tori dig deep to ask the questions you are also asking; Where did Osama bin Laden go? What’s it going to be like if I can’t preview my Kraft cheese before buying? And again, what is a pink sock?

And finally, Tori has a special announcement that leaves Leslie speechless, and we all know that rarely happens. Stay tuned to witness what is truly an historic occasion.

What a day, we have the fabulous von Hottie in the studio! Who is von Hottie, you ask? The “part pinup, part human graffiti,” von Hottie takes us for quite a ride while we discuss everything from her parents’ beef farm in Hawaii to fecal matter and Twittering. Beware - we don’t take many long breaths during this show. And we blame it all on the von Hottie cocktail!

You will need: St. Germain elderflower liquor, Proseco and a beautiful yellow lemon.

In a champagne glass, pour a small amount of St. Germain. Fill the rest of the flute with chilled Proseco. Garnish with a lemon twist.

This week we have a guest who no one will be able to understand. No, he’s not deaf; he’s British.  The lovely William will join Leslie and Tori as we discuss bad teeth, life at Hogwart’s, and why everything is better with gravy.

We’ll brief you on the fate of the 4th grade teacher who skipped classes to work as a prostitute, and discuss the issues in the United Kingdom with 12 years old boys becoming fathers. According to William, “They’re bored.”

And then we’ll have be a moment of silence for the woman from Salt Lake City who had the world’s record for the longest fingernails, only to lose them in a car wreck last week. See the “before” picture below … it can only be described as tragic.

It’s not every day we have a special guest in the studio - just once a week. Ladies and gents, put your hands together and cross your legs as we welcome Michael aka Miss Brandi Pleasant aka Miss Millennium 2008. Issues like PETA’s ad: “Sex is better for vegetarians,” stabbing out an ex-girlfriend’s implants and Tori curing AIDS through song are just so much more interesting with a homo/drag queen on the mic.